PSA: Those amazon reviews don't exaggerate, AVOID

"Battery Tender Unnecessary" (carac) 01/24/2014 at 18:59 • Filed to: None

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UPDATE: FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, JUST DON'T

CCC (formerly CyclistCarCoexist) > Battery Tender Unnecessary 01/24/2014 at 19:00

2

Guess you're tapping away at oppo while screaming away at a toilet....

Battery Tender Unnecessary > CCC (formerly CyclistCarCoexist) 01/24/2014 at 19:02

11

I was skeptical, only ate 8 over the course of a day, SKEPTICISM GONE. Now I'm feeling really bad that I filled my Father's candy dish when I went to their house the other day. It took 2 days for full effect and he had a flight this morning.

Aya, Almost Has A Cosmo With Toyota Engine Owned by a BMW. > Battery Tender Unnecessary 01/24/2014 at 19:05

0

Somehow i want to try that thing. Really.

Dusty Ventures > Battery Tender Unnecessary 01/24/2014 at 19:07

8

I feel guilty for laughing at this as hard as I am...

Blondude > Battery Tender Unnecessary 01/24/2014 at 19:11

1

Well now I'm interested.

Battery Tender Unnecessary > Aya, Almost Has A Cosmo With Toyota Engine Owned by a BMW. 01/24/2014 at 19:17

2

Some said they were saving some for the neighborhood punks that come by for trick-or-treat this year.

Battery Tender Unnecessary > Blondude 01/24/2014 at 19:17

3

I was too.........

m2m, apex detective > Battery Tender Unnecessary 01/24/2014 at 19:21

2

I can tolerate them ... feeling like a freak now. :o

Satoshi "Zipang" Katsura > Battery Tender Unnecessary 01/24/2014 at 19:24

2

Ihihihihihi...~ Just

As

PLANNED.

Nick, Drives a Cobalt LT > Battery Tender Unnecessary 01/24/2014 at 19:29

1

I want some....Wanna send me?

I have plans....

aquila121 > Battery Tender Unnecessary 01/24/2014 at 19:54

2

I just love how wonderfully descriptive and creative all those Amazon reviews are at conveying "I am in a prison of my own excrement forcibly leaving my every orifice at the speed of sound—I regret EVERYTHING."

NaturallyAspirated > Battery Tender Unnecessary 01/24/2014 at 19:55

0

It's the sugar alcohol; in this case, maltitol, which is the primary component of Lycasin. Pretty much all sugar alcohols have this effect on myself as well. It's pretty much impossible to find sugarless candy without some sort of sugar alcohol in it, too. Even the ones that advertise "Sweetened with Splenda" always seem to contain sugar alcohol.

I blame the Atkins people; sugar alcohol carbs don't count for people on Atkins.

Tom McParland > Battery Tender Unnecessary 01/24/2014 at 20:02

2

Told you bro :D

Destructive Tester > Battery Tender Unnecessary 01/24/2014 at 20:19

1

I can second this. Last week I made the mistake of trying a sugarfree drink mix with the same artificial sweetener... I met with the same result, it wasn't fun.

Clown Shoe Pilot > Battery Tender Unnecessary 01/24/2014 at 20:27

1

There are some sugar free gums that do the same. I didn't read the warning beforehand. That was an unpleasant afternoon.

deekster_caddy > Battery Tender Unnecessary 01/24/2014 at 21:37

0

If this is the first time you've tried these candies, we recommend beginning with one-fourth of a serving size or less.

Hahahahahaha.

Agrajag > Battery Tender Unnecessary 01/24/2014 at 22:08

1

I've never had an issue with these before, but now I'm terrified to try them again. Even if they wouldn't affect me, I'll somehow subconsciously cause myself to shit my pants.

RotaryLover > Battery Tender Unnecessary 01/24/2014 at 22:12

0

LOLOLOLOLOOLOLOOLOLOLOLOLOOLOLLOLL LL LLLOLL FUCK THAT I'M BUYING SOME FOR WORK!!!

TheOnelectronic > Battery Tender Unnecessary 01/25/2014 at 00:24

4

"In national news, authorities are still puzzled about yesterdays catastrophic explosion that forced an emergency landing aboard an American Airlines flight to Dallas."

puddler > Nick, Drives a Cobalt LT 01/25/2014 at 01:48

0

TERRORIST!

somebody take my guns!!

Stef Schrader > Battery Tender Unnecessary 01/25/2014 at 03:43

2

I don't trust fake sweeteners.

That being said, the next time I feel clogged up...

Battery Tender Unnecessary > aquila121 01/25/2014 at 04:09

1

The one about his war veteran grandfather's stories about the look of horror in a man's eyes when he faces certain death and seeing that same look in his friend that runs in from a party that served them...amazing.

DancesWithRotors - Driving Insightfully > Battery Tender Unnecessary 01/25/2014 at 06:44

0

I sent some to my younger brother. He was not amused.

Nick, Drives a Cobalt LT > puddler 01/25/2014 at 07:21

1

I'm no terrorist.

Wait.....does this count as biological warfare?

We should send these instead of troops overseas. Just send packages with an apology note inside so they think we have stopped doing what we do, then BAM explosive diarrhea.